The importance of having girlfriends.

I've been binge watching a popular black sitcom, as many of my peers have since Netflix released the news that we would be getting so many of our old faves on the platform; such as Moesha, The Game & others. But my current drug of choice, has been Girlfriends.

I personally grew up with 12 brothers and a sister and a host of various cousins; but 1 thing was a constant in my life was the masculine energy I was surrounded by. To the point where I found myself not necessarily liking women, or "girls" for a long period of time because of their "ways" that I found I disliked, maybe only because it was different than what I was used to. (Dolls over wrestling? Really?)

I hear alot of young women nowadays say that they don't like to hang with other girls, maybe for the same reason I had once believed I could not, or would not associate with many women myself.

And then I matured.

Losing my mother at a young age, I believe I searched for that maternal being in my life; that nurturing, that somewhat of a sisterly comradery that you find in your relationship with your mother once you become an adult. I craved that.

& God delivered.

Over the course of my life, I have had so many women step in as mentors, as maternal figures, as friends; as sisters. Helping me to recognize my own flaws, and helping me to discover my own femininity. For so long, I believed I was a tomboy, when the truth was, I really did love to get dressed up and play in make up and hang with my girl friends. It just took for me to be around the right people to teach me and bring that side of me to the light. (I am very much a diva at heart.)

My girlfriends taught me how to be a good friend, how to be a good partner in a relationship, how to hold myself accountable, how to give myself grace, how to take care of myself. Having women as friends helped me to know I wasn't alone; they gave me the space to be vulnerable, to own up to my mistakes and still they loved me afterwards. When I wanted to stay in my introverted bubble, they would let me, and not judge me, and just checked on me as needed. They showed me love, compassion and understanding.

My girlfriends taught me forgiveness, partnership and more importantly, teamwork. During one of the hardest times in my life, after my boyfriend was in a horrible car accident and I felt alone, my girlfriends were there for me. They helped me to understand it was ok to ask for help; to take time for myself to make sure I was ok. They came to bring us food, they called and checked on us consistently and gave us empathy that I had longed for and needed. They walked with me, took care of my dog while I stayed in the hospital and tended to my loved one, and they just sat on facetime and listened to me cry when needed.

The relationships we create in our life are very important; the people we allow to get close to us say alot. I have learned that its not women that I don't like, but rather a certain type of PERSON, that I am and wasn't particularly fond of. However, I love women. My type of women. The nurturers by nature. The life givers. The huggers. The ones that help you to see the positive in life and just a different perspective.

& I love and I am forever grateful for MY girlfriends.